I can’t stand reality TV. In theory, nothing about it appeals to me and yet I end up watching it from time to time. “True Life” is probably my favorite (check out “I’m an alcoholic” and “I work in the sex industry”). There is something about watching “reality” that’s kind of entertaining. Last week I caught a few minutes of an awards show just for “The Real World” (categories included best meltdown and hottest girl). My gut reaction was that it’s ridiculous to have an awards ceremony for one show, especially that show.

But then I got to thinking. This is a show that pioneered a genre (for better or worse). There are few shows that can claim as much influence on the television industry. Don’t forget that the reality show filming style has also influenced scripted shows like “The Office” and “Curb Your Enthusiasm”. “The Real World: Hollywood” will mark the show’s 20th season (it started in 1992, so there were actually a couple years with two seasons).

To put that in perspective, “Seinfeld” had nine seasons, “Friends” had 10, “Cheers” had 11, “ER” is in its 14th and “The Simpsons” is in its 19th. Why is a show like “The Real World” able to have a longer run than shows that are considered to be classics?

This is where my problem with reality TV lies. They can make so many seasons because every season is the same as the last one. They just bring in new people, put them in a new location and follow the formula. They don’t have to worry about resigning actors or writers. Each season is self-contained, so they could make 100 seasons if people keep watching.

I watched season two of “Survivor” and season one of “The Apprentice” on the edge of my seat every week. I really got into those shows. I followed the drama, I guessed who would get sent home and I had a good time with it. When the next seasons came along, I tried to watch but I just couldn’t get into it the same way again. It felt like I was getting in line for a ride I had just been on.

Apparently not everyone felt the same way because both of those shows are still on. Reality TV series will live for as long as they have an audience. So if you’re watching a show you don’t really like, do us all a favor and change the channel. Then again, there might not be anything better on.

Super Bowl commercials, as we all know, exist in a realm of complete and utter decadence. We’ve all heard the random figures of how much a 30-second piece of ad-time costs, how many millions of zillions of dollars it takes to broadcast a clip of a dancing monkey designed to move your product. It stands to reason that companies must think that the cost is worth the exposure.

It still goes to gross levels. I was talking with my mother on the phone the other day, and she said that she had seen “Super Bowl ad-previews”.  Think about that for a second. Previews of ads? Are we really, as a society, that dependent on the mass media to pitch products at us, to the extent that we LOOK FORWARD to it?

I watched the Super Bowl ads this year and made notes on some of my favorites and the ones I disliked. These ads come from the first half of the Super Bowl, as I was dealing with the catastrophic failure of my computer’s hard drive during the second half. (It’s okay, I think we can save it) So now, I present to you:

The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly of Super Bowl 42 Ads: (First Half)

I thought it was kind of funny that the first ad of the entire Super Bowl that I saw was for the O’Brien Auto Park. They’re really pulling out the big guns, eh? Reach for the sky, O’Brien Auto Park!

Note: Because the national anthem apparently doesn’t take long enough to sing, this year we have NFL players inexplicably reading aloud the Declaration of Independence. This section cracked me up, because there was a definite feel of some of the players having no idea what they were reading, or what it meant. They propped the speakers up in such interesting and random locations as abandoned railroad-yards, the decks of aircraft carriers, and halfway up staircases, and the like. What was the point, exactly? I don’t know if you’ve ever read the Declaration of Independence, but it’s basically America stating its reasons for revolting against British rule. Were we feeling anti-British all of a sudden? Does America’s current war tenuously link to a bunch of founding fathers who didn’t want to pay taxes to King George?  Who knows?

But on to the ads!

Good Ads:

Pepsi Max: I almost hated myself for liking this one. A bunch of sleepy looking people bob their heads and try not to fall asleep parodying the “Night at the Roxbury” SNL skit. Then they all drink some Pepsi Max, wake up, and bob more. You realize when you see this ad that this product must be strictly marketed to people who are about 20+ because, for one, children don’t need to wake up, and for two, nobody any younger than that would remember the SNL skit they’re parodying.

Fed Ex: A silly ad where a company replaces their current parcel delivery service with massive carrier pigeons. The pigeons wreck havoc, destroy buildings and break trucks, and cause general panic. Naturally, the solution is to use Fed Ex. Why didn’t I think of that?

Cars.com: A guy strolling around the used car lot demands a fair price on a car, which he gets through cars.com. He tells the salesman that if he hadn’t gotten it, he would have made the salesman fight “A stone circle death match with ‘Klondor’”, who appears to be a beefy, Samoan-type guy with fearsome rock knives. I just appreciate the morbidity, and the name “Klondor”. My first child, regardless of gender, will be named “Klondor” now.

T-Mobile: A continuation of the Charles Barkley and Dwayne Wade commercials that they’ve been doing. Wade gives Barkley his phone number and Barkley won’t stop calling about the most trivial things. Every time Wade picks up the phone he says, increasingly exasperatedly, “Hey Chuck.” I just think it’s funny to call Barkley “Chuck,” especially considering that I have a feeling if you really walked up to him and said that, he’d smack you in the face.

Doritos: My favorite commercial of the night.  A man sets a mousetrap, using cheese Doritos as bait. He sits there, waiting for the mouse to come out of a crack in the wall. He leans back in a chair, selects a Dorito out of his bag, and crunches it. Suddenly, a large man in a mouse suit bursts out of the wall and tackles him, and proceeds to basically kick the crap out of the guy. I like it because it wasn’t what I expected, which is more than you can say for a lot of commercials. Try something different!

Bad Commercials:

Bud Light: Bud Light has promised me “superior drinkability”. This suggests that other beers are not “drinkable”. I’m pretty sure they’re all liquids, Busch. What does “drinkability” even mean? More drinkable than what, wood? Steel? Calling your beer “drinkable” might be the laziest way in the world to market it. Hey, why should I drink your beer? Because it’s drinkable! It’s capable of being swallowed and has attained a liquid state! Whooooo!

“Wanted”: This is a movie trailer, and a completely ridiculous one. Morgan Freeman is in it. What does he play, you ask? A wise sage? A kindly old man? No, no. He’s an assassin! Yeah. First of all, Morgan Freeman couldn’t assassinate a goldfish, even provided with a toilet and a flush. It also stars James McAvoy, who is actually a good actor, but not well-enough known. I had hoped that being in “Atonement” would open some doors for him and forward him towards good projects, but instead he’ll be stuck in a movie about assassins with Morgan Freeman and Angelina Jolie. I wonder who will be the most convincing assassin among them. I’m guessing the one who manages to keep a straight face about this ridiculous movie they’re in.

Go Daddy.com: Ever since this internet start-up appeared, their ads have been simple. They’ve utilized a primal human concept: breasts apparently sell web domain names. While I’d call that a tenuous link, they probably know better than I do. This year? Not really much in the breast-area during the actual commercial itself, but it promises that “DANICA PATRICK REMOVES CLOTHING ON OUR WEB DOMAIN SELLING SITE, COME SEE!” So if you’ve got the hots for the only well-known female race car driver and need to register a domain name, you might consider checking that out.

Dell: Man walks down the street. People congratulate him. Women throw themselves at him. He is fondled by all. He walks into a cafe and opens up a Dell laptop. End commercial. Moral? Dell will get you laid. Apparently.

Busch: Why is the new Busch mascot a dalmatian?  Am I missing something? This one was training the famous Busch Clydesdales. I guess dogs know how to be horses better than the Clydesdales? The “Rocky” theme gets played just so you will know that this is a training montage.

Life Water: I think this is my least favorite commercial. A lizard drinks some life water and then performs the dance from “Thriller” with other lizards and a foxy human dancer. It is useless to look for a link to reality, logic, or sense. Just give up. I did.

And there you have it! As for the second half of the Super Bowl, I expect it was much the same as the first. If you want to view the Super Bowl commercials for yourself, (there’s a thought, you’d be actively seeking out product pitches, you consumer whore, you.) you can see them on Myspace.

If you’ve watched much television in the last year, you’ve probably seen some odd Wendy’s commercials. They feature guys wearing a red wig (like the red pigtails of Wendy herself) who usually preach about fresh burgers, ending with the phrase “That’s right.” According to an Associated Press story, Wendy’s is pulling this ad campaign due to underperforming sales.

Somehow I’m not surprised. Remember the Baconator commercial? Screaming masses run away from a guy in the red wig pointing backward and yelling “BACON!” This is only one of several strange scenarios Wendy’s dreamed up for the now-defunct ad campaign. It’s likely that these commercials left consumers more confused than hungry.

Will the ad campaign replacing it be any better? Let’s hope it will be a little less bizarre. They’re trading in “That’s Right” for “It’s waaaay better than fast food. It’s Wendy’s.” I’m thinking they’ll go for a psychedelic look. Any thoughts?

The TBS original series “10 Items or Less” begins its second season tomorrow night. TBS is still delving into original programming and has been hit or miss thus far. The network may eventually be able to grind into a niche the way FX has been able to, but for now its niche is still centered on syndication.

However, “10 Items or Less” is one of the better offerings TBS has put forward in the last couple years. The show is set in the struggling homespun groccery store Greens & Grains. The store’s optimistic manager rivals SuperValueMart, a Wal-Mart-esque uber-corporation that operates across the street.

In the first episode of the new season Leslie, the manager, finds $5,000 in silver dollars and attempts to use it as a promotion by putting five thousand dollar bills into a money machine where the dollars will float around and a customer can grab as much as possible in a minute. The promotion ends up attracting two robbers that hold the employees hostage while Leslie tries to avoid giving up any cash or getting shot in any way he can.

Some of the moments in the standoff are the funniest in the episode. However, the show tends to take an already ridiculous situation over the top to the point that it gets too goofy. While this is part of the show’s sense of humor, I feel that if “10 Items” can get rid of the over the top moments and focus on the straighter gags it will be a funny show. The situations and characters are ridiculous enough that the show is a lot funnier without that extra step into mayhem.

Regardless, the show is worth watching even with a few problems, because you will get some laughs out of it. Keep your expectations in check and I’m sure you’ll enjoy it.

Season two of “10 Items or Less” premieres tomorrow at 10 p.m. on TBS.

Last week Comedy Central re-ran “South Park’s” infamous “World of Warcraft” episode, which first aired last year. The episode, which was in my opinion one of the funniest of the show’s 10th season, pokes fun at gamers who invest endless hours socializing or questing or whatever it is you do in the “Warcraft” community.

While it repeatedly and openly suggests that these gamers have no life, it does in one way or another tip its cap to the game’s addictive nature. This must have been enough to convince the makers of “World of Warcraft” to book the first commercial after the start of the episode.

I agree that the shots “South Park” takes at the game and its players are good-natured, but it was still odd to see a commercial for the game just as the blows were about to fall. Kudos to “World of Warcraft” for being able to take a joke.

A dark cloud continues to hang over Hollywood, although it may not be there much longer. Earlier today the Writers Guild of America and the Alliance of Motion Picture and Television Producers restarted talks as the Writers Guild strike enters its fourth week. Whether this will mean progress is hard to say, but getting them in the same room again is certainly a start.

On a light-hearted note, check out what Writer Boi of the … er … WGA Crew has to say about it.

Whether or not FOX’s “The Next Great American Band” can reach the large fanbase “American Idol” procured, the show does feature some talented bands. Last week, Los Angeles based band The Likes of You did not receive enough votes to move forward to the top 10, which surprised lead singer Geoff Byrd.

“There were only a million and a half votes all together … I don’t feel like it was representative of all of America, but at the same time it was a bummer,” he said.

However, Byrd said it only took him about a weekend to get over it. After all, there were thousands of auditions narrowed down to 12 for the show. His five-month-old band The Likes of You is looking to get into the studio quickly.

“Looking back on it, I feel like it was the best thing that could have happened to us, for sure,” Byrd said. “We can actually move on to make a CD.”

The show will now move on to an all cover format. Byrd said this is a result of the show moving from two hours to one hour, which means there is only time for each band to play one song rather than two.

“The show is now doing only covers from now on,” Byrd said. “The only reason I wanted to get involved with it is original music.”

He likened the experience of being on the show to a band boot camp. It’s easy to see how that could be the case for a band that just started five months ago. Byrd has plenty of solo material from previous years, but said he wanted to deal more with new songs with his band.

“I wrote about seven or eight songs in two weeks, which is basically the crux of the new record,” Byrd said.

He said the new record is all written and the band will begin recording soon. The group’s chemistry has been solid from the beginning.

“We all got into a rehearsal and there was no trying out for the band,” Byrd said. “After the first song it was so good that it was like ‘Oh, this is a band.’”

For more information on The Likes of You, check out their Web site. “The Next Great American Band” continues tonight on FOX.

In case you’ve been living under a rock, here’s a quick post about the Writers Guild of America strike. Picket lines began in The Center Of The Film-World, Calif., Monday as writers and studios failed to reach an agreement. Late-night talk shows with Jay Leno, David Letterman, Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert have already been forced into re-runs. It’s only a matter of time before sitcoms such as “The Office” will follow.

An Associated Press article posted earlier today made the assertion that “If history is any indication, this walkoff could last a loooong time….”

It must be a grim situation indeed if the Associated Press feels the need to include four O’s in “long.” Granted, as that sentence continued to say, the last time the Writers Guild of America went on strike, it lasted for 22 weeks. A strike that long in this age of television could create monsters worse than those seen in the “Imaginationland” episodes of “South Park.” Our imaginations may run wild after all.

Reaching a 100th episode is an accomplishment for any television show. For “Family Guy,” this moment seems all the more special because few would have guessed the show would reach this number after being canceled by FOX.

Through syndication and DVD sales “Family Guy” fought their way back on the air and haven’t looked back since. This Sunday the 100th episode brings the series’ oldest conflict to a head, as the title, “Stewie Kills Lois,” suggests.

The episode begins with Peter and Lois embarking on a cruise together, during which Lois “disappears”. While the family tries to accept that she may never return, their neighbor and police officer Joe Swanson investigates the possibility that she was murdered.

Peppered with its trademark random flashbacks and references, the episode takes shots at Lionel Richie, Rosie O’Donnell and Harrison Ford, among others. If you disdain this aspect of “Family Guy,” don’t expect it to change anytime soon. The entirely random, sometimes pointless flashbacks are the bread and butter of the show, granted they have become increasingly prominent in recent seasons.

Critics may argue that these flashbacks keep the show from little details like a substantial plot, but I don’t think the writers care about this type of criticism. The somewhat risky formula makes the show stand out, take it or leave it.

Fans of the show won’t be disappointed, as the episode offers plenty of laughs throughout. And really, the writers don’t have to please anyone but the fans. The fans got them back on the air and to a 100th episode.

“Stewie Kills Lois” airs on FOX at 8 p.m. this Sunday. The episode will be preceded by a half-hour highlight reel starting at 7:30 p.m.